The Walking Dead: Season 5, Episode 7 – “Crossed”

In yet another largely unimpressive season, some of The Walking Dead‘s most interesting scenes this year concern the church, and, more specifically, involve Father Gabriel. When audiences were initially introduced to this character, he was annoying, meek, and naive. As the season has progressed, he is still annoying, but he has also proven himself to be crafty, surprisingly capable, and probably evil. Continue reading “The Walking Dead: Season 5, Episode 7 – “Crossed””


The Walking Dead, Episode 402: “Infected”

On Sunday afternoon, Andrew Lincoln’s Facebook fan page posted the following quote: “Episode 1 is full of hope. It’s the beginning of society. Episode 2 is . . . you getting punched, hard.” I don’t know about “getting punched,” but “Infected” is definitely the most entertaining episode of The Walking Dead in recent memory. Continue reading “The Walking Dead, Episode 402: “Infected””

Episode 401: “30 Days Without an Accident”

After an entire season of setup, I really could have done without another setup episode. You did it to me again, Walking Dead. I was disappointed last season, but in my heart, I believed that you would redeem yourself in the season premiere. I can’t believe I fell for it again. Much like Rick trusting in Clara, I really should have known better. Continue reading “Episode 401: “30 Days Without an Accident””

The Walking Dead, Episode 313: “Arrow on the Doorpost”

Hand over Michonne please. Please. I like the concept of Michonne, but I cannot bear another week of Danai Gurira’s dismal portrayal of what should be a fantastic character. Sorry, Danai. I’m sure you’re a lovely human being, but your ability to express depth is almost as non-existant as the compassion you draw from audiences. I don’t think that the Governor will leave Team Prison alone if Michonne is delivered to him, but what if he did? We’d never see him again! No more Governor, no more Woodbury, no more Michonne. Then my beloved The Walking Dead would be restored to its initial glory, sans this slew of offensively annoying characters.

I have nothing deep or contemplative to say about this espisode. That being said, every sex scene makes me cringe due to the scarcity of personal hygiene products in a zombie apocalypse. Halitosis must be running rampant, as Listerine and toothpaste are not the most essential of needs. The same can be said of deoderant. And razors. Thus Maggie and Glenn’s seemingly romantic tryst is, in reality, hairy and smelly, at best.

Also, was anyone else confused by this surprise summit meeting? For the first 6 minutes or so, I had no idea what was happening. A meeting of this magnitude should have been at least alluded to in previous episodes, but maybe everyone was too busy doing “Stuff and Things.”

Finally, I have one thing to say about the Governor. QUIT REMOVING YOUR EYEPATCH. Please. I don’t know where the hell you found that thing, but leave it on your nasty, pussy eye. Eye injuries are particularly disturbing to me, and that man never tires of exploiting the shock value of his injury. Ughh.

The Walking Dead – Episode 309: “The Suicide King”

In spite of my disappointment following the mid-season finale, I was genuinely hopeful for last night’s premiere. And then I was disappointed again. I don’t even know where to start; in essence, everything about this episode made me angry (with the exception of Lil’ Asskicker’s new mail bin bassinet).

The midseason finale was entirely hinged on the upcoming, fight-to-the-death bloodbath between Merle and Daryl. While it is a definite plus that Daryl is not dead, the highly anticipated battle was a complete letdown. Perhaps the aftermath was even more distressing – Daryl and Merle go frolicking off into the wilderness together and leave Team Prison vulnerable and alone.

Not that Daryl can really be blamed – Rick is far from stable at this point, and at least Merle doesn’t seem to have hallucinations of past conquests. Speaking of which, I wonder if the show’s writers will ever tire of mentally tormenting Rick in order to salvage mediocre episodes. Rick’s sanity has obviously come into question before, and it will be interesting to see if he continues to see (and hear) apparitions of dead group members.

Rick wants Michonne out, but due to the rising discord regarding Rick’s decision-making, I have a sinking feeling that she’s not going anywhere soon. Glenn and Maggie are having relationship drama. The Governor and Andrea are struggling, too. It’s hard to make a relationship work in a post-apocalyptic world, especially if your boyfriend is a power-crazed, one-eyed widower who just lost his daughter (again).

I don’t have much to say, thus the above rambling, incoherent post. I realize that this episode is mainly filler, and is largely functioning to put pieces in place for the inevitable meeting of Rick and the Governor. What is intriguing, though, is that the closer we get to this confrontation, the more similar these once opposing forces are becoming. Rick’s motives are being challenged, the Governor is not longer trying to hide his own. I’m still holding out for something mind-blowing for episode 310. Remind me I said that when I’m sobbing over my keyboard again this time next Monday.

The Walking Dead – A General Commentary on My Distaste for Michonne

With less than 2 days until the return of Season 3, I thought I’d take a moment to discuss my various problems with Michonne. Now, I realize that for some reason, people really like this character. I have not read the comic series, and I openly admit to being offended by Danae’s Gurira’s acting capabilities. These things being said, deep down, I still dislike the character. Continue reading “The Walking Dead – A General Commentary on My Distaste for Michonne”

“Made to Suffer,” The Walking Dead: S3, E8

This week’s The Walking Dead was both shocking and appalling for one very disturbing reason: I own the same shirt that Andrea was wearing. Purple. Button-down. Roll-up sleeves. Target, circa 2011. I should say that I owned the same shirt that Andrea was wearing; as of now, it is unlikely that I will ever wear that particular article of clothing again. Continue reading ““Made to Suffer,” The Walking Dead: S3, E8″